I guess I have reached that critical mass when either you blow yourself into pieces and become star matter (a part of everything else) or you become an eternal spirit.
I wanted to write so long about these feelings and I never allowed myself the opportunity to show you how capable I was of describing my feelings in a foreign language at the same time (my point is completely different though, as you'll see soon). The thing is right, that there is no proper language for feelings, feelings are alocated in a different part of the brain, they are no way close to Broca's Area, so I don't care about typos or misinterpretations... Feelings and language evolved differently.
It might be just the smoke of wheed mixed with tobacco and red wine, getting mixed in my blood stream, along with millions of the tiniest cells giving oxigen to my tissues all over my body. Who knows? We biologists are ignorant fellows who find themselves bound irremediably to the attractiveness of curiosity. But above all, we know and accept we are ignorant. We embrace ignorance 'cause (cuz) it's what makes us move, gives life to our muscles and limbs. It's like our basic energy source.
Whilst there's ignorance out there, we'll be here to shed some light towards the neverending darkness. Sadly though, we are alone in our individual quest. Our egos are too big. We hardly can withstand eachother.
I once had this revelation.
I dear to write this down 'cause it's going to be in English, otherwise I would not be this open with you, and I am about to get high and drunk, and I am about to cross the boundaries of the Dreamworld. I had this experience whilst I was practising shamanism in Chile. We had this 2 hours session of exercises and imaginery (imaginería in Spanish, when your imagination is guided by someone else's voice). We were supposed to be living the experience of hunted animals, on the verge extinction. We were about to die. We were struggling for our lives, so I run as I have never run before, like if my own life depended on it.
At the very end of our shamanic exercise our guide took us into a mystic place. A place where we were supposed to witness something special. Our guide never said what. He let us free at that moment. He guided us to a lake in the top of the highest mountain and in the reflection of the glowing waters I saw this revelation.
I saw most of humanity divided in 2 factions. The ones that became familiar with Nature and all natural spirits (animal, vegetal and molecular) and the ones that wanted to get mixed with the forces of the Artificial. Entires cities of human beings blending with mechanic devices, highly developed computers and AIs. Cyborg-like lifestyle. The others escaped into the wild. They became solitary people, strong individuals, blent with the sage of trees and rivers, their shapes shifting with the shapes of animals... they were free and independent, selfreliable.
But despite their differences they fought for space. The city-organisms were growing faster and they needed more space, and the dying forests, deserts, and mountains had grown stronger with the newcomers... They wanted to keep their freedom, their independency.
Suddenly, during this allucination I was experiencing (not having taken any sort of drug) I realised that I was different from both factions. I was one of the Third Kind. When I realised this, I also noticed I was observing everything without participating directly on any action. Instantly, having being chosen to fulfill this role I lost my lineage. I was turned into stone from legs to waist. This gave me the strength of the Earth to understand cycles of existence, from the coldness of stones I got the indifference to fulfill my duties as a Impartial. But at the same time it allowed me to keep my beating Heart (symbol of kindness and acceptance in shamanism), so in some way I kept my humanism.
A completely new sensation saturated me. I was taken far apart from the ones I knew and loved. I was turned into a guardian of the Equilibrium or Balance. With the constant sadness of the loss of my lineage in my soul, and being half-turned into stone, I became an agent of Death and Life. My duty was to kill inocents and guilty ones. Equilibrium always claims sacrifices from both sides. Justice does not exist, only Balance does. My left arm was transformed into a non-stoppable killing knife and my right arm into the only shield-restrain that could stop my knife.
My existence, my sole purpose was Balance. And I had to kill humans from both sides. And the most incredible part of it was that I realised how stupid it was to make jugdements about one side or the other. To pick up sides was suicidal, utterly pointless. I only longed for my lineage that became stone. That was my only burden.
Thanks... God speed to all of you
Enjoy the allucination... welcome to the realm of Maré
I wanted to write so long about these feelings and I never allowed myself the opportunity to show you how capable I was of describing my feelings in a foreign language at the same time (my point is completely different though, as you'll see soon). The thing is right, that there is no proper language for feelings, feelings are alocated in a different part of the brain, they are no way close to Broca's Area, so I don't care about typos or misinterpretations... Feelings and language evolved differently.
It might be just the smoke of wheed mixed with tobacco and red wine, getting mixed in my blood stream, along with millions of the tiniest cells giving oxigen to my tissues all over my body. Who knows? We biologists are ignorant fellows who find themselves bound irremediably to the attractiveness of curiosity. But above all, we know and accept we are ignorant. We embrace ignorance 'cause (cuz) it's what makes us move, gives life to our muscles and limbs. It's like our basic energy source.
Whilst there's ignorance out there, we'll be here to shed some light towards the neverending darkness. Sadly though, we are alone in our individual quest. Our egos are too big. We hardly can withstand eachother.
I once had this revelation.
I dear to write this down 'cause it's going to be in English, otherwise I would not be this open with you, and I am about to get high and drunk, and I am about to cross the boundaries of the Dreamworld. I had this experience whilst I was practising shamanism in Chile. We had this 2 hours session of exercises and imaginery (imaginería in Spanish, when your imagination is guided by someone else's voice). We were supposed to be living the experience of hunted animals, on the verge extinction. We were about to die. We were struggling for our lives, so I run as I have never run before, like if my own life depended on it.
At the very end of our shamanic exercise our guide took us into a mystic place. A place where we were supposed to witness something special. Our guide never said what. He let us free at that moment. He guided us to a lake in the top of the highest mountain and in the reflection of the glowing waters I saw this revelation.
I saw most of humanity divided in 2 factions. The ones that became familiar with Nature and all natural spirits (animal, vegetal and molecular) and the ones that wanted to get mixed with the forces of the Artificial. Entires cities of human beings blending with mechanic devices, highly developed computers and AIs. Cyborg-like lifestyle. The others escaped into the wild. They became solitary people, strong individuals, blent with the sage of trees and rivers, their shapes shifting with the shapes of animals... they were free and independent, selfreliable.
But despite their differences they fought for space. The city-organisms were growing faster and they needed more space, and the dying forests, deserts, and mountains had grown stronger with the newcomers... They wanted to keep their freedom, their independency.
Suddenly, during this allucination I was experiencing (not having taken any sort of drug) I realised that I was different from both factions. I was one of the Third Kind. When I realised this, I also noticed I was observing everything without participating directly on any action. Instantly, having being chosen to fulfill this role I lost my lineage. I was turned into stone from legs to waist. This gave me the strength of the Earth to understand cycles of existence, from the coldness of stones I got the indifference to fulfill my duties as a Impartial. But at the same time it allowed me to keep my beating Heart (symbol of kindness and acceptance in shamanism), so in some way I kept my humanism.
A completely new sensation saturated me. I was taken far apart from the ones I knew and loved. I was turned into a guardian of the Equilibrium or Balance. With the constant sadness of the loss of my lineage in my soul, and being half-turned into stone, I became an agent of Death and Life. My duty was to kill inocents and guilty ones. Equilibrium always claims sacrifices from both sides. Justice does not exist, only Balance does. My left arm was transformed into a non-stoppable killing knife and my right arm into the only shield-restrain that could stop my knife.
My existence, my sole purpose was Balance. And I had to kill humans from both sides. And the most incredible part of it was that I realised how stupid it was to make jugdements about one side or the other. To pick up sides was suicidal, utterly pointless. I only longed for my lineage that became stone. That was my only burden.
Thanks... God speed to all of you
Enjoy the allucination... welcome to the realm of Maré
2 comentarios:
y todo eso lo viste en las aguas de la laguna?
Shusha, sí po!! Fue la experiencia mística sin drogas que tuve en el chamanismo, lo conseguimos luego de 1,5 horas de baile sin parar. Como te explico lo cansado que quedé...
Publicar un comentario